Sexual tension is that potent chemistry between you and someone else that gives you butterflies and makes you nervous and excited all at once. Whether you’re flirting with someone you just met or you’re trying to turn a friendship into something more, creating this chemistry is a crucial step. With flirtatious touches, witty lines, and plenty of confidence, you can ratchet up the sexual tension and get both of you excited for whatever comes next.
Touch them in a casual, almost accidental way. When you first start talking to someone you’re interested in, start to establish touch early on by simply brushing up against them, or touching the back of their hand or shoulder. You can make it look like an accident at first, then get more purposeful when you start to get more comfortable with each other.
- If the person returns your interest, either by continuing the conversation or even touching you in return, get more purposeful. Try touching the small of their back or grabbing their arm or hand gently to escalate the tension.
- If you’re sure of their interest, try lightly grazing the side of their face. To make it more subtle, say something like, “I’ve got to get that hair out of your face, hold on… there you go.”
Look into their eyes like you’re intrigued and excited by them. Sustaining eye contact is a simple way to ratchet up the tension between you. Don’t simply look at them; look right into their eyes and give a half-smile, like you’re trying to figure them out. Glance away, then look back again.
- Looking deeply into their eyes shows that you’re invested and intrigued by them, which will in turn make them feel mysterious, attractive, and confident enough to keep flirting.
- Remember not to stare at them! Stay natural, glancing away from time to time, but allow yourself to make eye contact for a little longer than you usually would before looking away.
Start a low-key conversation to break the ice. Whether you’re just meeting this person for the first time or are looking to take an established friendship to the next level, your interaction should start at a place that’s comfortable for this point in the relationship. Bring up at topic you’ll both have something to say about, and encourage them to keep talking about it in a subtle, flirtatious way.
- For example, you could try talking about something around you by saying something like, “You’ve gotta tell me what’s going on with this drink. Do you have a name for that?”
- You could also try teasing them or giving a playful challenge. For instance, you could say something like, “Let’s make a bet. If I can push you in the pool tonight first, you have to give me your hat. If you get me first… it’s up to you.”
Tell a more personal or flirtatious story. Once you’ve broken the ice, start subtly introducing the idea of something more. Tell a story about a time someone was flirting with you and something funny happened, or point out other people who are flirting or teasing each other. Don’t be obvious about it; keeping the sexual undertone in the subtext will make it all the more alluring.
- Say something like, “Look at Amanda and Robbie right now. They’ve been flirting all night. How much do you wanna bet that he’s gonna ask her to dance later?”
- Try telling a personal story by saying something like, “The last time I was at this bar, the craziest thing happened. I was talking to this girl, and… well, I don’t know if I should tell you.”
Pull them closer and push them away, verbally and physically, to add tension. Creating a push-and-pull dynamic is one of the best ways to create sexual tension; you’ll show them you’re interested—but not too interested—then back off to keep them wanting more. You can do this both verbally and physically to create an exciting, flirty interaction.
- Try verbally pushing and pulling by saying something like, “I keep thinking how sweet you look… but I’m not sure I can trust you.”
- You could also play a bit of physical push-and-pull by doing something like leaning into them and talking right in their ear, then sliding away.
