Find a time to talk to your boyfriend when you’re alone and relaxed. Tell him how you feel by saying, “I’m ready for us to start having sex. How do you feel?” If you don’t want to tell him in person, text, call, or write him a note.

Prepare an ideal setting. If you think that he will say yes and want to have sex right away, prepare your surroundings. Light a couple of candles and invite him over to watch a movie, listen to music, or play a game. Make sure that you have enough time and privacy to have sex. 

Wait until you are alone together. Some relationship discussions are okay to have while you are out in public, but a discussion about something as personal as your first time together should be had in private and just between the two of you.

Tell him you are ready to start having sex with him. You may be sending signals that seem obvious to you, but he might not pick up on them. In that case, you might just have to gather your courage and tell him how you feel.

• Try asking him, “I am ready to start having sex with you, would you be into that?” or “How do you feel about becoming more intimate with me?”
• If you don’t like the idea of asking him to have sex, you could simply say, “I’m ready for us to start having sex, but it’s totally cool if you need more time.” Saying something like this provides him with the opportunity to take the next step or decline without too much awkwardness.

Respect his answer if he says no. If your boyfriend says he’s not ready, be understanding and don’t push him. He may just need a little more time. It is important to make sure that both of you are ready before you begin having sex.

Text or call to tell him that you want to start having sex. If you are too nervous to tell you boyfriend in person or you simply want to be able to plan ahead for your first time together, texting or calling him is a good option.

• If you text him, you can be direct by texting something like “Wanna have sex later?” This text will certainly grab his attention but it is casual enough that you can play it off like you were kidding, just in case he says no.
• Or you can try something more suggestive, tell him what you’re wearing or go with the classic “What are you wearing?” This may lead to a steamy sexting session or phone call. When it feels right, ask him to come over and see what happens next.

Show him instead of telling him. The next time that you alone together, use the opportunity to show him that you are ready to have sex. Make sure that you know that he is ready for sex before you do try to seduce him. If he says he is not ready yet, don’t take it personally. Just give him some more time and try again when he tells you he’s ready.

Write him a note. An email or handwritten note may be a perfect solution if you are having a hard time verbalizing the way that you feel. Write honestly about how you feel and keep it lighthearted. Also, make sure that he reads the note in private or in your company and that he either destroys/deletes it or keeps it somewhere very safe after he has read it.